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How To Thrive with CJ Finley

The Ambassador Of JOY, Barry Shore, as he brings You one of the most dynamic young Change Makers in the United States: C J Finley. Adrenaline junky, athlete, serial entrepreneur, husband, CJ quit his engineering career to pursue his passion of helping the world, and the people on it, THRIVE. You’ll be SMILING as Barry and CJ discuss the Day he Realized that working in the Corporate Space, despite his Love of Engineering, was NOT bringing out the Best in him. He wanted MORE. And the MORE that he wanted was to Be Of SERVICE. C J went MAD! This is a Must Share Episode with Family and Friends because Everyone Faces this Decision.

Listen to the podcast here:

Show Notes:

  • 00:45 – Barry’s rousing introduction

  • 14:17 – CJ on transform and allow you to thrive!

  • 20:40 –So ultimately, the most important thing we all have on this earth is time and I think a lot of people don’t realize that our time can be up in any given moment.

  • 30:55 –Your heart in itself is a miracle

  • 52:21- Barry’s Interesting Wrap-up

Important Links:

Good day, Beautiful, Bountiful, Beloved Immortal Beings and Good-Looking people. Remember you’re Good-Looking because you’re always looking for and finding the Good. We have good in abundance ,overflowing. Because you have tuned in consciously and conscientiously to this show, The Joy of Living.

You are going to be amazed at what’s going to happen for you. You tuned in to the show because you care most in the entire world about YOU. That’s great. Because when you become the best possible YOU, you make the world a better place. You build bridges of harmony. You create more Joy, Happiness, Peace, and Love in the world. That’s why you’re here.

You know that on this show we speak about the Three fundamentals of life.

These fundamentals are: Number One your life has a purpose.

Number Two, when you lead a purpose-driven life, you can go MAD. In this case, MAD is a wonderful acronym that stands for Make A Difference. You lead a purpose-driven life. You make a difference.

Number Three is to unlock the secrets and the power of everyday words and terms. Here’s a simple example. Right now, we’re being carried all over the world. There are, at this moment, over 349,617 people reading and listening via this fantastic, amazing mythical mystical platform called the Internet.

If you ask anybody, what does WWW stand for? They’ll tell you it has to do with the internet. And factually speaking they’re correct. But in our world, the world of the Positive, Purposeful, Powerful and Pleasant, WWW stands for Whata Wonderful World and Whata is a word. Thank you to Louis Armstrong, Satchmo, for enabling that song to go viral and touch not tens of millions or hundreds of millions BUT billions of people around the planet.

The purpose of this is that you tuned in to the JOY of LIVING because you know in this show, the result of you listening to the transformative advice that’s being SHARED with you from our amazing guests is that you will be Happier, Healthier, and Wealthier. And Who doesn’t want that?

That’s why you tuned in to the JOY of LIVING! Everything you want to know about our Amazing guest you can find at www.BarryShore.com. You don’t have to write anything down

Just go to BarryShore.com. All the information will be there. So lean in, and let all of this beautiful transformative information flows through, around and in you. And please SHARE this with at least FIVE people. Then we will touch over a million and a half people sharing these great, wonderful ideas.

Remember, all of this happens because of one word. Let’s talk about the story. Imagine the following. Standing up in the morning, hale and hearty, able to leap tall buildings and that evening be in the hospital completely and totally paralyzed.

That’s the story of Barry Shore.

Imagine that. Standing up in the morning perfectly healthy and in the evening, being completely, totally paralyzed. I became a quadriplegic overnight. It was not from a car accident or a spinal injury. It was a rare disease which I never heard of the day before. And now I’m completely, totally paralyzed.

I was 144 days in the hospital.

I was in a hospital bed in my own home for two years and couldn’t turn over by myself.

I was in a wheelchair for four years. I had braces on both my legs, from my hips to my ankles for years. And that was progress.

Thank God now I’m able to be vertical and ambulatory with the help of a 7-foot walking wand made for me by a Zen master.

But I still can’t walk up a stair by myself. I can’t walk up a curb by myself. And I have help 12 hours a day, 7 days a week.

But you hear my voice. Positive, Purposeful, Powerful and Pleasant.

And it’s all because of one word. That word is SMILE. Yes, S-M-I-L-E. It’s an acronym.

Remember, we unlock the power and the secrets of everyday words and terms. SMILE is an acronym that stands for Seeing Miracles In Life Every day.

Recently I was speaking to an audience of about 5,000 plus people and, God willing, we will be able to do that again very soon. We’ll go back and talk to real people. I tell the story of Barry Shore. I tell about SMILE and people raise their hands and say, “Barry Shore, I’ve been up for hours. I haven’t seen any miracles.” I ask them, “Are you here? Can you hear? Can you see, stand, walk, have water to drink, food to eat, a place to sleep, family, friends? Every single one of those is a Miracle.”

What’s a simple proof? Simple proof. One million people didn’t get out of bed this morning. Do you know why? They died! By definition, if you’re listening or watching this you didn’t. Therefore, you have an obligation to celebrate life to the full.

Heres’ a quick story. A few weeks ago, my 8-year-old niece comes over to me and asks, “Uncle Barry, can we spell smile, S-M-I-E-L?” I thought about it. It sounds the same. Why not. I asked her how come. She says, “Because then it will stand for Seeing Miracles In Everyday Life”! Out of the mouth of babes. What was she doing? She was creating the kind of world she wants to live in. CREATE is a wonderful acronym that stands for Causing Rethinking Enabling All To Excel. Because it’s all here in your mind. It’s called Neuro-Linguistic Programming. NLP. Your brain has 100 billion brain cells and over 100 trillion synapses connecting these cells and they’re there for more than deciding what kind of latte you want this morning.

You can become that which you want to be. The world needs you to be your BEST you.

I do have to warn you in advance that your humble host does use a lot of four-letter words. I even use the four-letter FU word, and I do it because of the shock value and because it’s Fun. Now the four-letter words that we use, because we live in a world that’s Positive, Purposeful, Powerful, and Pleasant…these Four Letter Words are:  Love, Hope, Grow, Free, Gift, Pray, Play, Swim. Four-letter words.

And the four-letter FU word is…. “FUNN”.  Right away, people are saying, “Barry Shore, fun is spelled with three letters.” Not in our world. In the world of Positive, Purposeful, Powerful, and Pleasant it’s FU—Capital N, Capital N!

So, after the show, when you see your family and friends, have a smile on your face and a twinkle in your eye. You point your finger and say, “F-U everybody.” Remember to add right away Capital N Capital N. And they’ll say, “What are you talking about? Where’d you get that?” You say, “I listen to Barry Shore, on The Joy of Living, and he wants to teach the world to FU…Capital N-Capital N.”

Before we bring on our amazing guest, and it’s truly going to be a FUNN session, I’m going to urge everybody to do the following. I want you to use the Two Most Powerful Words in the English language Three times a day from now and the rest of your life. When you use these Two most powerful words in the English language, you’re going to Make A Difference for you, your family, your friends, and all living beings.

These two words are……… “Thank You.”

THANK stands for To Harmonize And Network Kindness. The Dalai Lama has been quoted as saying and I’ve read in his writings, “Be kind whenever possible. And it’s always possible he says.

Imagine you’re going into your coffee shop, and you order your fancy latte. You go in, you order and you sit down. Somebody brings it to you, you say, “Thank You.” Now imagine you go into the coffee shop. You order your fancy latte. You sit down. A few minutes go by and nobody brings it to you. You go to the counter, and they say, “I’m sorry, we’re busy. We’ll bring it to you.” You sit down and a few more minutes go by. Someone brings it you, you still say, “Thank You.”

Imagine, you’re walking out of the coffee shop and it’s raining out. Somebody holds the door open for you, you say, “Thank You.” You are walking out of the coffee shop. It’s raining out. Somebody slams the door on you! You say, “Thank You.” You’re in traffic. You’re late for an appointment. Somebody cuts you off, you say, “Thank You.” You get up in the middle of the night, you stub your toe and it hurts! You say, “Thank You.”

To Harmonize And Network Kindness. KIND stands for Keep Inspiring Noble Deeds.

I can’t think of anybody more I’d like to share with you at this moment who does inspire your noble deeds than this wonderful, delightful CJ. CJ, please say hello to 353,821 people around the world.

Speaker: CJ Finley 

Hello, I am so inspired and so happy to be here right now for this experience. Thank you so much, Barry.

Speaker: Barry Shore 

  1. No, CJ, what was the last time somebody said FU to you and you smiled?

Speaker: CJ Finley 

Right now.

Speaker: Barry Shore 

Pretty cool, right, fuNN? So, as everybody can see if you’re watching or if you can hear, I’ll tell you, CJ is, he is a true millennial. He’s just about 30 years old and he’s had so many smiling, he has great teeth, beautiful eyes, wonderful wife, great friends and such like that. And guess what we’re going to talk about on today’s show, by the way, everything, everything you want to know about CJ Finley and the whole Thrive process and everything he does, you’ll be able to go to the website, barryshore.com, you don’t have to write down everything, remember everything just lean in and let all this great stuff flow through you, around you and transform you because that’s what CJ does. He transforms and allows you to thrive, just go to barryshore.com, all the information will be there but what we are going to discuss today with CJ is you ready? Life and death, what did you say, Barry? I said life and death so on that wonderful note, wonderful CJ, not even 30, let’s talk about that right away. Let’s jump right in and tell us what the heck do you mean, when you’re talking about, hey, I want to thrive, I want to live? What is death have to do with that?

Speaker: CJ Finley 

Unfortunately, a lot of people are just surviving and I want to inspire people to do more than just get by. And no matter who you are or where you are or whatever your conditions are, you have the choice just like Barry describes to all of us, to have fun, be kind and ultimately thrive. Now to me, thrive means time, health, relationships, income, vision and experiences. So, I break it down into the most important things for myself, so that each and every day that I wake up, I am going to be optimized and wanting to thrive on life and that is my brand. So ultimately, the most important thing we all have on this earth is time and I think a lot of people don’t realize that our time can be up in any given moment. And kind of the story that I tell around this is a story that is one of my own, where you’re driving to your corporate job you studied if you went to college, I went to college for engineering and then you get this job to get the money, driving to the job and you start realizing wow, like if this were my last day on earth, would I want it to be like this, no?

Speaker: Barry Shore 

And you said?

Speaker: CJ Finley 

Nope.

Speaker: Barry Shore 

Wait, millennial let’s do it again. He’s driving to work and he asked himself the great existential question, if this is my final day on earth, do I want to be driving, which is not bad but driving to a corporate job that doesn’t make me feel like I am serving the world, that’s really what you’re saying. Right?

Speaker: CJ Finley 

Correct

Speaker: Barry Shore 

And your answer was NOPE, by the way, he wants to change the end to an H. So, he went from nope to hope. It just made that up.

Speaker: CJ Finley 

I love that, I’m going to take that from now on, that was awesome.

Speaker: Barry Shore 

That’s why I gave it to you.

Speaker: CJ Finley 

That’s the thing, I thought that I had no hope. I went to school and I spent a lot of money and thought I was doing the right thing and you get out and I’m lost, I ultimately am lost and then the other thing, the next thing, which is you have your time, I realize I’m not spending my time in the way to make the impact that I want to make and then my health starts deteriorating. And then real quickly after that, if your time isn’t spent the right way and your health starts deteriorating, your relationships start to not manifest into what you want them to become. And then the thing that was working for me and I think this is what straps a lot of people is the income was okay, it was good. And it basically, I was sacrificing time, health relationships for that income but ultimately the vision and experiences and half of that that I wanted in life, they weren’t there. So, I fortunately have a wonderful wife and at the time, we were just dating and she kind of experienced the same thing and we bonded together and now today I am fortunate enough to run my own business and partner in a couple other companies that are our ultimate goal is to help mission base people brands and businesses thrive with that acronym.

Speaker: Barry Shore 

So, let’s talk about Thrive and I’m going to share with you another acronym that you’re going to want to use and that is around the word time because you’ve mentioned it many times so far. So, time is the ultimate currency. It is and only lives moment to moment and when you add it up you have a day, if that day is not spent, enjoy happiness, peace and love, then you can say that may not be the best use of my time. Now, time stands for in my vocabulary, I have four or five different ones but you might like this one. Time stands for thinking it’s miraculous every day, thinking it because it is, right? And then the result of that is time also stands for teaching others but teaching, it’s miraculous every day. So, the first one CJ that you had to teach that is miraculous every day was who, you. See, you also said something that was profound and what everybody is listening, we have people listening all over the world, 80 plus percent of the people listening are under the age of 38. Most of them are in your category, somewhere between 23 and 32 and there is this desire of course, to live well in our society, to have as many things as possible but when you are thing oriented, then you are bound and constrained oftentimes by needing this thing called money and I use the word needing purposely because when you do that you are creating will be called ‘golden handcuffs’. Now, slavery has been outlawed in most of the world for a long time but we tend to enslave ourselves as you were just saying so beautifully into thinking, wait a minute, if this is where it is, this is the best that it could be, I have a job, I’m going there, I have a girlfriend, I may have a wife, I have a family but I have a job and it’s not allowing me to thrive, then what good is it? That’s not living life to the full, life stands for living inspirationally for eternity? You weren’t doing that, were you CJ?

Speaker: CJ Finley 

Not at all.

Speaker: Barry Shore 

And you said, I am moving away and I’m going to build something and that’s what you planned. So, talk to us about what you’re building with you and the Thrive team?

Speaker: CJ Finley 

Yeah, so I love everything that you said there and ultimately for me, it comes down to what can I do in each and every moment to make every heartbeat count. And kind of like, the way that I love the acronym for time, making things miraculous is your heart in itself is a miracle, the fact that you have something that’s beating inside you like ultimately, every single person, that’s what your limit is, is once that thing stops, there’s nothing going. So, I came to this amazing city of Austin, Texas and wanted to kind of surround myself with other people that viewed the same thing that I viewed and that was that every single day when I wake up, I’d rather make an impact and serve other people and be healthy, happy and wise, wealthy and wise and really make the biggest impact that I can make. So today, ultimately, I kind of started with the team last year inside media where we were doing education services online, COVID, kind of pivoted into the digital space and then I had to get rid of my office because it was just becoming too much of an expense with COVID but today, I am fortunate because with the health kind of crisis that we’re in, I partnered with my buddies over at MSW lounge and now every single week like tomorrow, I’ll be at a luncheon learn and helping them film where we have people come in and learn how that they can improve their own lives through their health because we’re big believers in that, if you’re healthy, happy, wise, wealthy, you’re just going to go on and spread that. So, I’ve really kind of changed the mission a little bit into focusing on how do I invest my time and money into other companies that are already built and have customers and clients and products and services to sell and how can I help them thrive and then ultimately reach more people? Because one of the things that I was struggling with during COVID was rising tides off, lifts all ships is something that I say and when you’re trying to do things alone, it just doesn’t work. So, what I tried to figure out was, who out there was already doing some of the things that I already wanted to do. And then today I’m fortunate enough to say that I do that, that’s just one example. There’s a couple other examples where I teach teenage entrepreneurship and stuff like that.

Speaker: Barry Shore 

Let’s let back on what you just said because the genius of what CJ is talking about belies his age. See, there is no such thing as younger and older when it comes to understanding that it is a team experience or a partnership experience. And when you try to do things on one’s own, well, you might get very far, you might actually change the whole world, that’s great but even a Jeff Bezos didn’t do it on his own. On the contrary as he said, if I didn’t have 1000s and 1000s of people, granted they use my energy and I shared but many people much smarter than I attracted. You see, what CJ is talking about, is attracting like-minded people and that’s the beauty of living in today’s environment and using Thrive, let’s just talk about thrive again, thrive uses these great words, time, health, relationships, income or investments, whichever you choose but they’re basically the same, vision and experience. And when you do that in a team setting, there is no such thing as limit and if you ever thought there was a particular limit, that’s okay because you’re gonna blow through it and go to the next limit. That’s the genius by the way, team, you might like this one CJ, team stands for together everyone achieves miracles. And I want to applaud you because what CJ said and what he’s doing and this is really the key, what he’s doing is that he was searching for people already doing things that he’s thinking about partnering with them and using that synergistic energy to be able to create, remember causing, rethinking, enabling all to excel, create another paradigm, a bigger paradigm, a better paradigm, as was called dream big and it’s not related to age, it’s not related to sex, it’s not related to anything or earning income is all related to your ability to recognize that you are mad, you make a difference. So, let’s continue talking about what you’re doing with these, let’s say lunch and learn and processes like that, walk us through what happens in that kind of process.

Speaker: CJ Finley 

So, I’ll backtrack to I was doing lunch and learns on my own with the thrive team and then just resume and stuff like that. And then now we’re back into a health lounge where that studio was watching me and for anybody out there listening, the more you do and the more people that you help, there are people that are going to be looking at you and seeing and inspired by you and then they’re going to reach out to you. So, I had no idea to be honest, what I was doing. I just had an office that I had to pay the bills for and I was like, how can I help people from this office that nobody can come to right now because it was in 2020. So, I bought new gear, everything and spun that up and then nowadays, what it looks like is the company that I’m helping, every single week, every single Friday, we do a new health topic. So, the nurse practitioner there will give a health talk, he did liver last week. So, we’ll do like IG TVs and then we’ll have people in there 20 to 30 people in there learning about health and there’s also the coolest thing is free food from one of my buddies companies, it’s called prep to your door here in Austin, Texas that’s building sustainable food products to help change the agricultural system. They’re actually raising money right now so if that’s your thing, go check them out. Pfizer’s the founder of that he’s awesome so they get food and they learn at the same time from an expert in this field, where they’re not really going to get that experience anywhere else. And then the cool thing is they get it live, I’m there recording it so that anybody like my parents that want to tune in from North Carolina, I can then send them that link afterwards or they can tune in live just like here and watch it and we can ultimately help educate people on their personal health and what’s going wrong with them. And then above and beyond that, after that day, after that Lunch and Learn, we’ll go through and we’ll sift through different clips and things like that to share with people and then they can reach out to nurse Doza himself and ultimately get their health in check. And it’s cool because another company that I help is with teen entrepreneurship and we teach college credit programs, we had to do the same exact thing. It was in person I was teaching here in person in Austin and then now we teach through zoom where we have a Slack channel for the kids, the teens and they have a community. And we host hangouts where people like yourself, Barry will come and talk to the teens for an hour and they get all inspired and they’re their own miracles and creating their own miracles, which is awesome but we had to pivot and go into zoom and then have weekly zoom meetings. So, it was really cool to see all these businesses, what I learned on my own, we started transitioning all these other businesses into digital businesses and ultimately, just like you mentioned earlier on the show, the goal was to spread that impact and just empower other people to spread the impact as well.

Speaker: Barry Shore 

I want to go back to something you said because it all began with four words, everything you just said begin with four words and this is the genius of what you did CJ. And what I’m going to say right now applies to CJ because he said the words but it applies to hundreds of 1000s of people that are listening and I always urge everybody, share this with five people so that we’ll touch a million and a half people. You want to share this because these four words are the key to making a difference in the world and the four words that CJ said were, how can I help, you remember that CJ?

Speaker: CJ Finley 

Yeah.

Speaker: Barry Shore 

That’s what you asked, how can I help? Now, you’re going to, might like this little riff, how stands for helping others win, who, stands for winners help others that’s what you’re doing and winners inspire never ending endurance, that’s the wine we like to drink. When it is inspired, never ending in enthusiasm, that’s the wine we like to drink and the ability now to bring people together to learn something that is good for them, remember this show is all about you not about Barry Shore, not about CJ Finley, great guys that we are, it’s about you. Why are you becoming the best you and he says something I thought was, I chuckled a little bit, he wants to be able to send a link back to his family in North Carolina, that’s great, that’s part of an eye America. He’s in Texas, North Carolina, it’s the world, there is no geography today. I know for a fact, there’s over 2,680 people in Mumbai watching this right now, in China people are watching, in Ghana, people are watching, in, where is that, they told me the other day, was it in Paraguay, in Uruguay, all over the world.

They probably even in Houston, Texas. The point is the geography is gone but it still all depends on the human being asking that question of four words, how can I help? When you do that, you are releasing literally atomic energy into the universe because it becomes less about you and more by others. I swear to mentioned to you, you might like this a lot, CJ, the word community because you used it. Community is a fabulous idea and we all we know how to spell it, right, COMMUNITY? Noticing community that the U comes before the I because when everything is built on that, then you can have a community that flourishes. Even business when it’s done right, the U comes before the I, see if it’s me out there doing something, me, I want you to, okay fine, you probably might succeed and as long as you have good ideas that be great but it’s the ability to know that is built on community just to you, how can I help, that’s what CJ did. And remember all of this is built on that acronym called Thrive; time, health, relationships, income, vision and experiences. He has talked about experiences, let’s talk a little bit about vision before we go to our break, tell us the big vision, the Dream Big for CJ, your wife and the people you work with?

Speaker: CJ Finley 

So, the biggest vision I think that all of us have and we kind of delineate all our core values and this is how I decide whether I want to work with people is everyone I work with has to be willing to educate other people in some capacity. And then the other one is not only do they educate; how can they help beyond education because education will teach you something but how do we help them take an action? So, we basically can connect them to resources, capital, things of that nature to not only give them the education that they need but also help them take an action and then spread like wildfire. So, that’s kind of how I delineate how I’m going to work with other people and then those other people believe in the same beliefs. My personal vision when I created this was ultimately how do I take the 18 year old, 19 year old, 20 year old, 21 year old and invest in our youth and give them opportunities that I did not have or aren’t even created yet. So, when Thrive was initially created, I wanted to be an incubator, an angel investor where I take people that have ideas but they just don’t have the education or the resources to take the action because I’m a big believer, there’s so much talent and ideas out there that never get off the ground, just because of those two reasonings that they don’t have the proper education, they didn’t have the parents that I had that sent me to the things that I got to go to or then be, they just really didn’t have the resources to get connected. Maybe they don’t have Wi Fi right now, they don’t have internet, they can’t, they’re not global right now, it really confuses me how there’s places on Earth right now that don’t have Wi Fi and don’t have access. So, it’s like thinking through things like that, that really fire me up so the big vision ultimately would be to create some type of company or fund that can really help people that don’t have the resources or the education to get their ideas off the ground. And then for me, it’s not even about the money, it’s finding a way to continue to grow those ideas and teach and educate and make this world a better place and if I do that, the money will come.

Speaker: Barry Shore 

On that wonderful high note, put on your seatbelts everybody, we’re going to go to a break. We have wonderful sponsors, they love us, we’ll be back with more amazing, wonderful CJ Finley right after these brief messages. Don’t go away. This is gold.

BREAK

Good day, everybody, Barry Shore here. I’ve had the privilege of being involved in five startups in my career and I can tell you categorically, working at a startup is unimaginably hard and I wish I had what I’m going to be talking to you about now, it’s called notion, NOTION because having one spot to organize everything and work as a team makes it much easier. All your notes, your documents, your projects, you’re processing, your tasks, I mean it’s great, don’t you wish you could have one way to pull them all together? Well, now you can, for startups, notion can provide a full on operating system for running every aspect of your company keeping everyone aligned as you grow fast and take on more. If you’re interested and I urge you to become interested, you want to find out more, notion is running a special offer just for startups, you’ll get up to $1,000 of notions team plan by going to notion.com/startups to give you a sense that’s almost a year of free notion for a team of 10. Again, that’s notion.com/startups to receive up to one thousand dollars in free credit to use notion with your team. I urge you to do this now, that’s up to $1,000 value when you go to notion.com/startups, do it now you’ll be glad you did, you’ll thank me and I wish you great success. Imagine the kind of place you would want to show up for your favorite, for baby pet; honestpets.co, well, you found it, honestpets.co not .com, .co This is your go to spot for the best, the cleanest pet treats that exist anywhere in the planet. All of the brands go through a rigorous review to make sure they meet the high standards of cleanliness, health benefits and naturalness. This site was started by a husband and wife team and it’s veteran owned and that care about pets especially dogs and cats and coming soon bird treats. These are very nice, young people who really care about making a difference because a portion of proceeds go to support veteran organizations with a focus on service dogs. This is the place where you want to go, you want to tell your friends this has the finest, yummiest, freshest all natural treats and stuff for your fur babies so go there, honestpets.co, do it now.

Speaker: Barry Shore 

Good day beautiful, bountiful, beloved immortal beings and good looking people, remember you’re good looking, so always looking for and finding the good. We have good and abundance overflowing today in the person of C. J. Finley and we’re talking about life and thrive and health and action. CJ, we left on that beautiful note that information is wonderful but it’s not transformational, that’s what people want. They need transformational processes and that is embodied in action. Let’s go use as a springboard, this idea of health because without health there isn’t anything, you’re not happy, you’re not wealthy, you’re not wise, health is the key. Now, health is a great acronym, it stands for helping everyone achieve life through happiness, isn’t that health, helping everyone achieve life through happiness? You know what the opposite of health is, death? We talked about it right, what is death, you know what death is, doing everything against true happiness, isn’t that what death is? You don’t have to be physically in a coffin to be dead. If you’re not living your life to the full like you said, you were driving to work and you are, excuse the expression, half alive, half dead because you will question, what am I doing? Is this what I wanted if this is my last day, is this where I want to be, that’s not living? You said I’m not doing everything to have true happiness, therefore if you’re not alive, remember, this is the digital world kid, right? You know, the digital world is either on or off, it’s not the other way. So, if you’re not in life, you’re in the other place, therefore choose life. So, let’s go forward and discuss what it is that’s how you’re teaching and touching not just people your age but younguns, people 16, 18, 20 who by the way, have either never been exposed to real education, I don’t mean university. University in my humble opinion, you ready for this, a waste of time? I’m going to say it again. Okay, I got 1000s of you that are oh Barry Shore, come on, waste of time. The greatest university, the greatest teaching in life is adversity not University, adversity because only when you face real issues can you know who you are, can you choose life. Remember, we talked about choice not chance determines your destiny. So, here’s this amazing guy, CJ Finley choosing to say I want to live life to the full, making every heartbeat comp and he attracted a wonderful woman to share the vision with him. Right? Sharing vision is the key, sharing stands for spreading happiness and rejuvenating energy. So, let’s talk about the energy that you bring to, you again, use Lunch and Learn as a microcosm of what could be spread through the world to similar communities because you may have 20 people in Austin, you may have 10 people in Dallas, you can have 15 people in Houston, you can have 12 people in Nairobi, Kenya, you can have people in Dubai, it doesn’t matter, it’s the same process, CJ. Right? Talk to us, it starts with asking the question, how can I help?

Speaker: CJ Finley 

So, the biggest thing I think anybody can do and you’ve mentioned it here before is we have to help ourselves before we help others, we can’t pour from an empty cup. So, I recommend just from like, practicality is getting a notebook and just writing down how you spend your time. So, on a pie chart, what you can do is you literally can list out, we all have 24 hours in a day and you can’t buy any more of that and we can’t get any more back. So, you list your 24 hours out and then you start realizing okay, depending on how much you sleep, six to nine hours, take that chunk out. How much time do you spend eating? How much time do you spend driving, texting on your phone, watching TV and you start seeing is this ultimately what I want to do with my life and real quickly for most people, they’re going to start visualizing and there’s where the ‘V’ word comes in, that this isn’t the experience that I want to have on this earth. And once you get done that pie chart, you can start filling in, okay, what do I really want to be doing with those 24 hours? If I had the ultimate day that I could spend with myself on impacting this world? What would I do with my 24 hours and then slowly but steadily, you need to change your habits and behaviors. Now, habits are key to spending the time the way that you want to but habits are predicated on behaviors. So, list out what behaviors do you have that you think are negative and then what behaviors do you have that are positive? We can’t always get rid of our negative behaviors we’re human beings, we are prone to making mistakes but what we can do is outweigh them with our positive behaviors. So, figure out what those positive negative behaviors are and then the last step would be find people that you admire, people such as Barry, your parents, yourself, what do you admire about those people? And then how do you align those behaviors and those habits with the time and the people you admire, how are they spending their time and why do you admire the time that they spend? And ultimately, what you’ll start doing is spending your time in a way where you’re spending way more energy and taking action on the positive side of your behaviors and your habits and you become the person that you looked up to and this is what we do at wit, which is the teen entrepreneurship program, shout out to them. We teach them principles to live by and it has nothing to do with academia and then they learn these principles and they use them whether they’re trying to get a job, whether they’re trying to get an internship, whether they’re going back to their normal curriculum or going to college because our whole goal isn’t to deter them away from what they want out of their life, it’s just to give them tools and resources to take action in the way that they want to. And as you said, Barry, it all comes down to more of the mindset and being positive and pouring the energy in the way that we decide each and every day, rather than the negative, the death side which is against the true happiness and practically, that’s how I kind of go about it, figure out your 24 hours and then decide what behaviors are good and bad. Who do you admire and then align all those and you’re going to be surprised how your life changes in 30 days?

Speaker: Barry Shore 

Wonderful CJ has just given us recipes for what we call the success cake and when you bake it not only does it come out of the oven, everybody says wow, that smells good, I want some of that. You start slicing up and dishing it out and guess what? Good, it tastes better than you can ever imagine. CJ, this is great because the famous question is, are habits good or bad? And the answer is yes but you have to decide which ones you want to keep, which ones you want to emphasize and lesson and you know yourself, thank God well enough to determine what it is you want to do because again, the six most important we’ve learned this four most important words in life, how can I help, that goes by the way of washing dishes for your wife or your friends and stuff like that? How can I help, you don’t ask, you do, taking action as you said, CJ. The six most important words you’ll ever hear in life are choice not chance determines your destiny, you have been given a recipe by CJ, go to barryshore.com, all the information is there. Do what he says though, get that notebook, get a piece of paper, matching that a piece of paper and a pen. You can do it on your fancy computer, your iPad but I happen to prefer using something as old fashioned as a pencil or a pen and a piece of paper and make a circle and then look at it and then that pie becomes you. When you do that you thrive because that’s what CJ is all about, thrive. By the way CJ, I want to speak a little bit about dog poop, okay?

Speaker: CJ Finley 

Yeah, fine.

Speaker: Barry Shore 

Wait a minute he doesn’t even look surprised. Barry’s going to talk about dog poop because he already knows already that there’s something that kind of make fun with it, right, remember fuNN?

Speaker: CJ Finley 

I’m here to learn.

Speaker: Barry Shore 

But this is what he’s talking about so by the way, you remember, when we used to be able to go in an airplane very easily, remember like you said, you need to make sure that you have a full cup before you can serve others. So, remember going on the airplane and you’re sitting in the airplane and the front of the airplane, either the person in front or they have a video tells you, look if there’s a change in cabin pressure, somebody will come down from overhead and here’s the key, counterintuitive. If you’re traveling with a child or somebody acting like a child, what do you do? You would think you’re going to put something on the child first to help them breathe but the answer is no, counterintuitively put the breathing apparatus on you first and now you can help the other person. It’s only when you are breathing well and you are calm and aware capable of serving others that you can be of benefit in this world. So, now we’re talking about dog poop because everybody knows that dog poop is, right? And you think you do but dog poop is a great acronym, it stands for doing of good, power of one person. CJ is poop, don’t tell you friends that, they may use the other word because when he was talking to us, when you make the pie chart, what he’s telling you is your consciousness will shift, shift happens. Now, most people, CJ as you know, as well as I do that they drop the F sometimes, I don’t know why and they don’t pronounce that shift fully but it’s shift happens, so dog poop is doing of good, power of one person, the power of CJ determining, I don’t want to drive to this job anymore. I love the people I work with, all that but it’s not for me, it’s not what I want to do. I want to live life to the full and moving, he’s shifting his course and now he’s doing how can I help? That’s what he does every day, that is called life, not the opposite, not death, that’s called life. And when you do that, you recognize one person helping another, helping another and pretty soon, you’re talking about literally, we’re in the midst CJ, I think you’ll agree at the moment of what I call a joy deficit in this country, in the world, right? Walk and you’ll see people that are gloomy and glum, joy deficit. We can create a joy surplus without printing trillions of dollars. It just takes one person helping another, reaching out to another, reaching out to the end, we can do hands across America, we are the world. All those things that you think about and hear about it begins with you, YOU not Barry Shore, yes, CJ Finley, what he’s doing animates me. I thrive by listening to CJ, I thrive by hearing the stories, I thrive when I know that he is here, when he gets off this podcast he’s going to run around the house pick up Erin and say you know what whoopie, this is fuNN! He’s going to tell his wife fuNN but the point is here is that this is all about dog poop, doing of good, power of one person because then you choose life, life stands for living inspirationally for eternity. Okay, wonderful CJ, let’s discuss of the idea of relationships for a bit because in my humble opinion, it is the essence of living well. It’s really the anchor, thank God you’re married, God willing you’ll have to start building a family soon but it doesn’t matter if it’s, whoever your partner is, the point of it is relationship building. Talk to us from your perspective what relationship building is for family, friends and other living beings?

Speaker: CJ Finley 

So, I’m going to be honest and transparent with this one, I used to think I knew what it was and I ran into some trouble in my lifetime. And a lot of it was in like, I became enlightened when I started dating my wife, my now wife and learn truly like what relationship building is. And in the beginning, I thought relationship building and a lot of younger people will probably think the same thing is you get your business card out and you go to different career fairs and you join the fraternities and you play the different sports and intramural leagues and I was building a lot of relationships. However, they were all surface level, they’re all what can I get from knowing this person or what can I get from knowing that person rather than what can I give and grow deeply with this one person that I know has potential that I see within them. And I know that I have potential within myself to help them get to that potential and for my wife specifically, that hits home with her as well because we wouldn’t be who we are without each other and that’s when I started realizing that relationships, I don’t like the word there, there’s a word being thrown around like codependency and dependent on each other, we’re both whole human beings. I don’t like other half, that word either, we are whole human beings but we are 100% better when we are around and in the same room together. And what I mean by in the same room, it doesn’t have to physically be in the same room, it has to be on the same page. So, if you’re listening out there, what I mean by on the same page, whether it’s your significant other, your friends, your family, it all starts with communication and being openly communicative with all of them and saying, this is what I want out of my life, this is what I’m doing, what are you doing? Can I help you do what you want to be doing and things like that and just being communicative? And even if they disagree and even if they don’t want to jump on your ship, that’s okay, because we’re all human beings. And once I got a little bit older and learned that there’s a time and a place for everything and that just because somebody wants to do life in a different way than I want to do right now, doesn’t mean I need to write them off. So, my relationships ultimately became better because I began to support people who in the past I might not have supported because I just disagree with one viewpoint they have or something that they don’t agree with me on rather today, I live a much more abundant life where I’m supportive of everybody and what they want to do with their life but I’m also transparent that I want to spend my time with people who kind of live the life that we do, bringing joy to each and every day. 

Speaker: Barry Shore 

I want to unpack a couple of things because you are the point of the spear, wonderful CJ because of your age, your chronological age, I will mention to you, everybody, when you get past the age of 25, in my humble opinion, has four ages all at once. You have your chronological age, you have your metabolic age, you have your mental acuity age, you have your S.O.W, see what is Barry talking about so then we’ll talk. So, you have a chronological age, let’s say you’re almost 30, 29, you have your metabolic age, maybe you’re actually closer to 22 because you play a lot of sports, you do things you’re fairly physically active. So for me, I’m 72 chronologically, I’m 48 metabolically because I swim two miles a day, six days a week and my mental acuity is 28 because I hang around people that are in their 28th and my S.O.W, S.O.W stands for sense of wonder, my sense of wonder is eight year old, not childish, child-like. So, what you’ve been saying here is that you have been able to evolve from the ‘normal aspect of a grasping human, which is very childish, me to recognizing instead of becoming a go getter, you become a go giver’. In the essence of life, the joy of living can be summed up in one-word CJ, giving. When you become a giver, now you can really become a liver, we talked about liver before. Well, the liver, the nerves talking about livers, is talking about something physically and atomically should also tell that person I’m a liver. I live life to the full, as an example the word ALONE is often mispronounced. Most people pronounce ALONE as alone and they feel alone, right? But it’s not pronounced that way in our world, CJ. In our world, positive, purposeful, powerful, pleasant, ALONE is pronounced all one because you said it’s so genius, you literally genius. It’s not two halves coming together to form a whole, two wholes, WHOLE forming a unit together, that is super abundant, that’s when abundance happens. When your mind thinks in abundance, when your speech is in abundance, your actions are in abundance, you become a spiritual chiropractor. Your doing of good, power of one person. CJ, you have really moved me, I am so grateful that you’re here and that you’ve been sharing with us today. I’m going to ask you three quick questions, are you ready?

Speaker: CJ Finley 

Yes, like you.

Speaker: Barry Shore 

Number one, will you come back again?

Speaker: CJ Finley 

100%, this was amazing.

Speaker: Barry Shore 

Thank you. Number two, I’m going to ask you in 80 seconds, it’s all you get 80 seconds, your most fervent desire? 

Speaker: CJ Finley 

So, I actually, this will take less than that, I live by a quote called discipline over desire. Everybody has desires but not everybody is willing to be disciplined enough to do the work to get to their desires. So, I focus mainly on where can I improve my habits and my behaviors and be disciplined enough so that my desire to make the world a better place and leave it better than when I got here, it actually happens.

Speaker: Barry Shore 

Your most fervent desire is that people should recognize it and incorporate it into their very beings?

Speaker: CJ Finley 

Yes, take what I say and take action on it.

Speaker: Barry Shore 

Thank you and the third question is are you ready to accept a hug in front of 356,822 people around the world?

Speaker: CJ Finley 

I love hugs so this perfect.

Speaker: Barry Shore 

Okay, let me tell you what hugs stands for, are you ready?

Speaker: CJ Finley 

Yep.

Speaker: Barry Shore 

Harmonizing unlimited giving, so here we go, 1, 2, 3, roar

Speaker: CJ Finley 

That was awesome.

Speaker: Barry Shore 

And thank you everybody tuning into, the joy of living with your humble host, Barry Shore. Remember on this show we discussed the three fundamentals of life, one is life, your life has purpose you lead a purpose driven life you can go mad, mad is a great acronym that stands for make a difference like CJ and his wife and his family and his friends and all living beings. And number three, uncover the power and the secrets of everyday words and transmit you do that you’ll be happier, healthier, wiser and wealthier, such words as www, what does WWW stand for, what a wonderful world smile see miracles and life every day with my eight year old he says, see miracles in everyday life. Create the kind of world we want to live in, like CJ is doing, causing rethinking, enabling all to excel, you have the ability to do Neuro Linguistic Programming, use four letter words like love, life, grow, hope, free, give, swim, pray, play, tell the world fuNN, you got to add that right away, lest they’ll think something’s wrong with you. And remember to use the two most powerful words in English language three times a day consciously, conscientiously. Thank you, thank you to harmonize and network kindness. Our blessing to you is go forth, live exuberantly, spread the seeds of joy, happiness, peace and love, go mad, go make a difference.

About CJ Finley

CJ Finley grew up with passions centered around sports, technology, and community, but traded them in during his early career for a “secure” and “stable” path as an Engineer. A few years into this way of life, constant struggles with his autoimmune disease and the sudden passing of several family members caused him to flip his outlook on life. He questioned his current way of living and dreamt of the impact he truly wanted to leave behind some day, and he knew that it would take a leap of faith and a path less traveled to get there. With the constant reminder that life is an opportunity and a gift — and one that shouldn’t be taken for granted–he left everything on the line to make a positive impact. Soon after leaving his career behind, he started THRIVEONLIFE as a way of inspiring others to do more with life than merely survive. Now his brand exists as a small-business that partners with mission-driven founders and brands to help identify areas that are preventing the companies and their people from thriving. They work together to build sustainable systems, tech-automation, and marketing channels for clients and partners. Outside of “work,” CJ enjoys cultivating local communities, hosting events, and building connections with guests on his podcast. He strives to spread hope and optimism for a healthier future to anyone he comes across. CJ currently resides in Austin, Texas where he does his best to live life to its fullest and MAKE EVERY HEARTBEAT COUNT.